Thursday, December 11, 2014

The End of a Season

My first semester as a college student has officially come to an end, as of this afternoon. My bed is stripped of its sheets, the majority of my closet is stuffed into a Nike duffel bag, and the linoleum floor is vacuumed and swept. The rain is falling slowly outside my dorm window, and the skies are a dull gray, as if reluctant to let go and move on.

Despite the bittersweet sensation of knowing that these past three months have stretched, challenged, and enlightened me in ways that I would have never anticipated, I am hopeful. My eyes are set upon the Lord, and my heart is eager to follow Him wherever He will lead me. I know that it's a journey that will take perseverance, courage, willingness, and trust--a whole lot of trust. And that can be exhausting.

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." (Lamentations 3:22-24)

This verse has spoken so closely to my heart lately. It's a wonderful, refreshing reminder to know that each day is a new start, another opportunity to live into the person that Christ has called me to be. That my sins and mistakes are forgiven before I commit them, and I am loved beyond all measure. It's also a reminder for patience. Sometimes, God doesn't speak for a long time. He is silent, and He continues to be silent, even through the difficulty of circumstances. It initiates a concern for whether God is listening, whether your desperate prayers will ever get answered or acknowledged. But He is your portion. He is for you, and with you, and beside you. Be patient and strain forward.

"As God nurtures, protects, prepares, and initiates us, he restores us to the truth of who we are and the reality of the life we are living and meant to live.” -Stasi Eldredge, Becoming Myself: Embracing God's Dream of You

As this holiday season quickly approaches, I pray that you find comfort in the unknown and uncertainty. Because God knows and God is certain. Allow yourself to not be okay, to feel broken and a mess, and you'll realize that nothing is ever out of Jesus' reach.

Blissful blessings,
Amy :)

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Happy Thanksgiving!

"When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around." ~Willie Nelson

The holiday season is upon us, and we have so many reasons to be grateful today. This past Sunday, I attended a church that I had never been to before, and the message was on gratitude. Gratitude not only in the sense of being thankful for certain things in our lives, but gratitude manifesting itself in every aspect of who we are as human beings.

Gratitude means humility.
Gratitude means compassion.
Gratitude means courage.
Gratitude means selflessness.

"give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

Thanking the Lord for everything that He has provided you is merely the first step to being infused and fulfilled with gratitude. His only Son was slain for our salvation, for our sins, for our sake. Jesus is the perfect example of gratitude; what a respectable and honorable deed He did on that cross. I don't know about you, but sometimes it's really difficult to see past the present situation and into the future of what God has for us. Our lives become so encapsulated in how others can serve us, how others can please us, and never about how we can do that for them. It's easy to be selfish. Am I right?

Today, I am thankful for the rescue mission that Christ ventured on for me. He knew me before I even had an idea of Him, and three years ago, I was given a life-changing opportunity that would shape me into the woman I am currently. I am thankful for the brokenness that I was pulled out from, that my family and I endured together. Darkness can be so blinding, but the light is even brighter.

"Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever." (Psalm 107:1)

What are you thankful for today? How are you practicing the art of gratitude?

Blissful blessings and gobble gobble,
Amy :)

Friday, November 14, 2014

Weary and Burdened

This week has been very heavy on my heart. Not only were there certain events that impacted my university campus, but it was especially trying and workload-heavy in regards to classes and scheduling out the next four years of my life. Talk about anxiety-inducing, right?

Sometimes, straining to hear the voice of God is hard. Imagine walking around your day-to-day life with a white transparent sheet over your head, hindering you from clearly discerning what objects and people are on the other side of the sheet, but still able to make out distinct shapes and forms. That's what a relationship with Jesus is like. The path that He calls you on is ahead of you, and you know to put one foot in front of the other in order to continue, but you're not entirely sure where that path is leading.

Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. (Galatians 5:25)

What does walking with Jesus look like? For one, to walk is to stride along at a level, even pace. It's calm, it's cool, it's collected. There's no rush to advance to the next destination. There's not a lacking of motivation or energy. Walking with Jesus is similar to walking alongside a dear friend whom you wish to carry a conversation with, giving and taking. It's intentional and purposeful. It's thoughtful and considerate.

A relationship with God is a two-way street. Many times, it becomes to easy to leave God behind in the dust and take our situations into our own hands. We compartmentalize God. "I'll give this disagreement with a loved one up to you, God, but I think I'll keep my anger to myself." There are a plethora of situations that we experience where our faith in Christ is not wholehearted or thorough; rather, we claim that we can fix the issues that trouble us without Him. That's where things begin to fall apart.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)

This verse has been on my heart all week, mainly because Christ Himself states that He will give us rest. He is our provider, He is our refuge, He is our home in which we make our dwelling. God will never force or coerce us into anything, but He will simply guide us as we give him our time and our space. Like a loving parent who wants the best for their child, their actions stem from their investment and compassion. God would do anything for us, seeing as He already sacrificed His own son on our behalf.

Going into a mid-November weekend where the temperature is below freezing every morning and the promise of winter is right around the corner, realize that God is walking with you. He demands to know more about you, about your life story and your heart. He wants to look into your eyes and be captivated by your emotions and thoughts. God believes that you are valuable and worthy, and He is willing to hold your hand as you continue to put one foot in front of the other.

Blissful blessings,
Amy :)

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Patience is a virtue, they said...

Patience is also a commandment from the Lord.

I have never been good with patience. Patience for waiting in the line at the grocery store, for Saturday to arrive quicker during a long and tedious week, or just patience for the ins and outs of life in general. There's something so irksome about the feeling of restlessness that begins to creep up your toes, spreading to your legs and then your torso and through your fingertips. The sensation of mild anxiety that overcomes your being, and your mind becoming consumed with whatever agenda it desires to move onto next.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. (Philippians 4:6)

Why, you may ask? Why should you give your worries to the Lord?
Because he will provide. He will answer your prayers. He will take those thoughts of inadequacy and uncertainty from you and replace them with an all-encompassing and graceful peace. God hears your every cry, audible and inaudible, and knows that you will reach a point where only He can intercede. So many times in our lives, our personal fears not only hinder and distract us from attaining a goal which we want to accomplish, but it also takes away our trust from God.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

To trust in God means to die to yourself. To trust in God means that your faith in Him and His abilities takes precedence over the doubts about yourself and your abilities. Trust can be a scary thing. It can be a very risky, circumstantial bargain. However, our God is no ordinary giver and receiver of trust. He trusted us, as human beings, enough to sacrifice His own son. That's insane. Why should we owe him any less?

I am not here to preach at you. I am not here to condemn or look down upon you for your misfortunes, for your evil deeds and sinful nature. The Lord is good, and I have tasted and seen the beauty of His work in my life. Not for a second do I doubt that He's done the same for you, in some way or another. Imagine a loving parent smiling at their young child, not because they had earned a successful and admirable grade in school, not because they cleaned up their mess after eating, but JUST BECAUSE. Just because that father or mother sees their own son or daughter as theirs, as precious, as worthy and valuable, and loves them wholly and unconditionally. That's how God sees us.

Wait upon the Lord. It might take a year, it might take a day, but whatever is meant to be will find its way.

Blissful blessings,
Amy :)

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Convicted by God

To be convicted by God doesn't always look like it. Tonight, the Lord came to me in such an abrupt and unexpected manner. I have never been someone who can attest to the extraordinary stories of God's loud, booming, and tangible voice in their life, although I think it would be amazing. No, I truly felt the presence of the Holy Spirit floating over me as I sat and prayed in the chapel of my university at a student-led ministry called Hosanna.

Lately, my prayers have been mediocre. They've been lax. Isn't it preposterous how we claim the title of a Christian, yet forget to fully trust God with even the little things? Isn't it ridiculous that the Bible tells us to fear the Lord, and recognize that He is mighty and great, but go and take our faith lightly? I know I'm guilty of this, and I can hear Jesus calling me back to Him and His heart.

There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. (Ephesians 4:4-6)

As the first part of Ephesians 4 was read up on the screen, I realized that the grace of God is not normal. In fact, it violates all the societal clichés and stereotypes of what our lives should look like. Grace is unmerited favor. It does not demand anything of us. It does not have expectations or standards. It is given freely, and that is an incredibly powerful concept. God's majestic wonder is even more glorified in this passage, depicting a beautiful image of the covenantal relationship that He has entered into with us, His children, as human beings. It's the most stunning love story since the beginning of time.

Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work. (Ephesians 4:14-16)

Paul hits home with this last bit of the passage, acknowledging that because of Christ, we are changed forever. Because of Christ, we are no longer the same. Because of Christ, we are compelled to live differently, to love bigger than ever before, to be transformed from the inside-out. We are referred to as "infants" who lack the ability to discern right from wrong and truth from lie, and are easily caught up in the desires of the world and those separate from God, but Paul is confident that this will be left behind with our new knowledge in Jesus. Our maturity will expand, and our minds and hearts will be engorged with the desire for the Spirit, slowly but surely growing and learning even more.

I left Hosanna a little early, walking back in the brisk cold at a fast pace, thoughts overflowing and overtaking my being. I remember slowing down a bit to glance up at the night sky, the stars bright in the clear air. I couldn't help but shiver, not from the breeze, but from the true splendor of God and my awe of Him. He is unfathomable to the human mind, but He is still so knowable. With a God so loving and compassionate, so humble and gentle, how can one not bow down and worship at His feet?

You are valued. You are cherished. You are forgiven. You are redeemed. Never forget that.

Blissful blessings,
Amy :)

Sunday, October 19, 2014

Friendship vs. Fellowship?

"One of the most beautiful qualities about true friendship is to understand and to be understood." ~Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Friendship has been on my mind a lot recently. So has fellowship. Some would argue, from a Christian perspective, that these two are very closely correlated and intertwined. However, something I've realized in the almost-two months of being a college student is that friendship and fellowship can be completely separate entities.

I'm going to be honest, transitioning from high school to college was a giant season of growth for me. I graduated with the optimistic mindset of getting myself plugged into a solid group of friends right away in my freshman year of college, only to discover that true relationships take time. A lot of time. It's so easy to open up, to be vulnerable when the moment calls for it, and to indulge and participate in a feel-good conversation with another person who sees eye-to-eye with you on a plethora of topics. In fact, it's wonderful. We were created for community. We were created for intimacy.

Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body--whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free--and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many. (1 Corinthians 12:12-14)

God doesn't desire for us to live alone, to do life alone. He knows what we need, and He so graciously provides it for us. Just as the human body is a working system made up of different parts that are vital to its synchronization, our faith too needs the same support and upholding of procedure to function well. There's nothing more powerful than a group of people who love Jesus coming together and seeing His love emanate from one another.

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. (Proverbs 27:17)

It's so true how the friendships you surround yourself with eventually are the building blocks for your growth in personality and character. The Bible clearly states that one person affects and rubs off on the other, "sharpening" them, whether that is an implication for good or bad. Living in such close quarters in a college residence hall has great potential for these relationships to form, and it's imperative to find people who are rooted in Christ, and continually acting as a source of encouragement and love. These people will not only speak both truth and grace into your life, but will come to walk alongside you in your journey with Jesus.

I am slowly but surely realizing that friendship and fellowship can differ vastly, but are also capable of coexisting at the same time. I trust that the Lord is extremely provisional, and the plan He has set ahead of me is one that will be beyond even the greatest outcome I could imagine. This season demands crucial patience and waiting on God, as well as acceptance for the control that I am letting go and giving up to Him. It's definitely difficult to do, but sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same.

Know that God loves you, with a fiery passion and a humble heart. Bask in the incredible knowledge of His sovereignty over every area of your life, that there's no part of you that He isn't aware of. Most of all, take that with you wherever you go. Be so filled with Jesus that you just can't help but feel compelled to share how joyful you are. It will show, I pinky promise you.

Blissful blessings,
Amy :)

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Finding God in the Silence

I don't know about you, but it's so incredibly natural for me to pray that God will come along whenever He feels like it, wave His mighty hands, and fix everything that seems to be going awry. More often nowadays, my prayers have become routine and cadenced, not something that I do willingly throughout the day. It isn't a healthy place to be, and it pains me to say that it's the unfortunate truth.

I was sobered by a real conversation I had a few weeks ago with some friends who live in my residence hall. Needless to say, I was a sobbing mess. We had just got out of discussion group for our three-hour Thursday night Christian leadership class, and turning to my friend, my stoic expression shattered and the tears started to fall. I wasn't entirely sure why I was feeling the way I did. It seemed that I could no longer hear or remember God's voice anymore, as if my ears had slowly gone deaf over time and my memory of His love began to fade. However, I'm thankful for a community at my school that is so compassionate and eager to reach out to others around them who may be hurting or broken.

"I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me--just as the Father knows me and I know the Father--and I lay down my life for the sheep." (John 10:14)

Christ is our shepherd. He is our caretaker, our caregiver, our safe refuge. Doesn't it blow your mind to even try to imagine how much His love for us even is? We live in a world that knows not one single ounce of unconditional love, and Jesus exemplifies that repeatedly in the Bible. I read in Donald Miller's Blue Like Jazz that "to be in a relationship with God is to be loved purely and furiously...and a person who thinks himself unlovable cannot be in a relationship with God because he can't accept who God is; a Being that is love." Wow. God and love go hand-in-hand.

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:38-39)

As Paul, who was once Saul, writes this letter to us from his newfound knowledge in Christ, he makes it absolutely clear that there is nothing in the entirety of existence and beyond that has the power to unbind and untie God's love from His people. There is no amount of sin, disobedience, or even the enemy's foothold that can ever take you away from the Lord. Not even by your will would you be able to escape Him. That is incredibly comforting.

Today, I implore you to seek out the voice of God. Whether that's turning on worship music, finding a quiet place to read your Bible, getting together with a group of other believers, or just sitting and praying, it is so incredibly important to realize that you are not alone in this. Jesus walks with you, He walks beside you, He walks ahead of and behind you, and He is holding your hand every step of the way. Be confident in that, no matter what.

Blissful blessings,
Amy :)